This has been one hell of a module. I can’t remember the last time I had to learn so fast on my feet or worked so hard. It’s been draining and more than a little scary. But I think I’m maybe a little better for it.
At the start of the project I was feeling very cynical. Last year’s field was a total joke and I didn’t expect much to be different. But I was hoping I could at least refine my drawing technique a little and maybe prep myself for trying to do painted-on-glass animation. So I was vaguely hopeful I’d get to improve something about myself.
My skills with prep-work and organization have sky-rocketed. In no other piece have I planned so carefully or made such good prep work. I’ve even been on a sort of schedule for once. I think my drawing, or at least my confidence in doing so has improved. And my use of colored pencils I’m sure has gone up in quality. I think I’m finally getting the hang of this underpainting thing. And I’m learning to use washes more effectively. I’ve re-learned just how useful extra reading is. I’ve also made some dents in the mental barriers and bad habits that either stop me working or make me quit early. I’ve even found flashes of my old motivation.
So I’ve done well there.
I haven’t had many new ideas to speak of. This module has been more about refining old ones. I did most of my great discovery of art years ago. But working so intimately with the ideas from Peralandra has made me think about the story and how much choice is a theme in it and how it is shown so differently from how choice is shown in the book as in Kierkegaard. Kierkegaard views choice as a burden, almost a curse. But Lewis shows the greatest of choices done in innocence. Would Kierkegaard approve? Would he even consider the new Eve’s choice a choice at all? Can see be free if she doesn’t feel angst about her choice?
I don’t know if that has any relevance here. But it might blood into something interesting later.
I’m not sure if I can go into any depth about how these developments might impact my work. All of this will impact on my work if I capitalize on it. I feel like a breakthrough were I could become a real artist is within my grasp if I just have the courage to take it. And that scares me. But the most immediate one is I’d way readier for the comic book module next year. The thought of that much original drawing would have terrified me before. And it still does. But I now at least believe I can do it. There was a time when I would never have believed I could. And I’ve become motivated to learn how to really use a camera. That is going to change my animation work completely. I’m sure of it.
Thanks. It’s been a great ride.
John's Learning Journal 